About Notches
Notches is a letter from a father to his son, one lesson a week, from age seven to twenty-one.
You know the pencil marks on the kitchen doorframe? Every birthday, the child stands against the wood, and someone draws a line just above their head. Years later you find the marks and see how far they came. These letters are meant to work the same way. One small notch a week.
How it works
Each week has one idea and one picture: a driver holding the reins, a plank across a stream, a box with the lid open. The letter is written to be read aloud, start to finish, in about six or seven minutes, at the dinner table or at bedtime. There's nothing to prepare and nothing to fill in. You just read it.
It's written the way a good book for that age is written, with short sentences, real stories and a few jokes along the way. As the child grows, the words grow too.
Under each letter there are two short notes for the grown-up. After reading gives you one small thing to do together that week, with the exact words to use. What to watch for tells you the change you're hoping to see, and the ways the lesson can go wrong.
The number tells you where you are. 7.01 is the first week of being seven. 21.52 is the last.
The six threads
Every lesson pulls on one of six threads. They come back every year, a little deeper each time.
- Driver. Staying steady: calm, courage and holding your own reins.
- Heart. Being kind: going first, telling the truth gently, standing next to the kid who's alone.
- Head. Being curious: asking why, being wrong out loud, learning on purpose.
- Chess. Thinking ahead: looking before you move, seeing the other side.
- Body. Being strong: moving every day, sleeping well, losing well.
- Hands. Making things: making instead of watching, finishing, showing work that isn't perfect.
Who writes it
A father, writing to his son. Some of the ideas are very old, and the stories are told the way they've been told to children for a long time. Neither of us is named here, on purpose. The letters are meant for any parent to read to any child.
If you read one to your own kid, I'd love to know what they said back.